I nod to the end of my life,
whenever it may reach me.
For I am ready to travel
to worlds far beyond the stars.
A Nod to My End
Not Talent, No.
Pieces of her writing and and words shove me through the page until I am there and have to blink away the vision, shocked that words could grab me so. Not talent, no. But the ability to craft a reader to a writer’s soul.
I actually wrote this about an author whose book I am currently reading. I am not done reading the book yet, but I hope the ending is as beautiful and as grasping as her writing. Let’s give a shoutout to the artists who inspire other artists and keep the magickal flow of passion dancing in us all.
Book I am reading: The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab
Paint a Feather
Paint a feather
into my soul
So I may fly
And be forever known
Starts with one
Until it grows into wings
Paint me a feather
So I may be free
From a Vulnerable Place
This week has been a very vulnerable week, as I write this from a different state about to attend a funeral. From the recent death, all the rejections I’ve gotten so far, and dipping my toes into a past that threatens to drown me, I would say that it has been challenging mentally. I tried to find a poem I have done in the past this morning before having to get ready that didn’t sting and burn to the touch of a thought, but the only one I found was one that I thought fits well to the day I had yesterday.
Resentment inhabits me from so long ago.
Alone. My family’s eyes boring into me.
Always the outcast.
No one by my side.
I never want the same for you.
Kerf in a Forest
She was a greenhorn
who made a kerf in a tree
but little did she know
the forest wasn’t pleased.
Eyes were all watching
hidden nearby
All could care less
that she was told only lies.
Sent out to awaken
the monsters of the leaves
but little did she know
the demon she unleashed.
Sorrows of Failure in the River of Dreams
Lost in my River of Dreams,
warring against the current that propels me in directions I don’t want to go,
I drown in sorrows of failure, but have glorious breath when my face rises.
I hope to reach a time where air is a given
and dreams become the land where I can walk.
May we all reach that land where we can live out our dreams and not be lost in the river forever. Keep fighting, keep rising for breath, and keep against the current that tries to pull you under.
Be a “Dope” If It Means Following your Passion
Most times a “dope”
Who sticks to his “dopey” things
Will make everyone out to be “dopes” in the end.
Examples:
*Gamers grow to make world-known games
*Someone who can’t communicate grows to help millions of kids learn to connect
*The class clown becomes a famous comedian
Then there is you. Stick to your passions and follow your dreams.
(Thought after the sad poem, I would write something funny / inspiring thanks to a #vss prompt this morning. The message : Don’t Judge. Not even yourself. Keep being you and keep following your passions because they may be the clearest road to your dreams <3)
When Was It?
When was it that I broke?
When was it when I couldn’t take rejection any longer?
When was it that I closed myself off and wouldn’t let myself feel or be happy?
I remember that carefree self who always reached.
And wanted nothing more than to love.
But now, a distant memory, I stand alone.
Only a comfort to myself.
I Play Ventriloquist
I play the ventriloquist.
Begging you for help.
But I don’t let you see
the words forming from my mouth.
I need you to step in,
when I’m sinking in to do’s.
House work, school work, three children.
Way too much to do.
Sports take all evening.
E-learning takes all day.
Let’s not forget meal prepping
and bathing not too late.
Myself is losing focus.
Forgetting who I am.
No time for self reflection.
No time for where I stand.
This is for the parents out there struggling. I feel you. We normally live a very busy life with three daughters and we have a very busy schedule. Lately along with the rest of the world, our lives have gotten way more stressful and chaotic as we fight to do the right things while trying not to take away from the children. I choose to live a very full life with them and right now with them all so young it is very easy to lose who I am. I am so very thankful and lucky to have a husband who battles time along with me to help save my self identity. He helps me make time and pushes me to follow my dreams so that after parenthood I will not have lost myself. I know that not everyone has that. So if you do not have that person, you need to be that person. As hard as it is to find time for yourself and for your goals, you need to keep on fighting. You are YOUR savior. I choose to conquer one small goal at a time each day no matter how small. You can do the same. You can do that and be in this battle right along with me and countless others to save our true selves who we have pushed away. We are all in this Battle for Self Identity together all fighting our own obstacles. We can have the role of parent and take on the smaller battles until we have time to tackle the bigger ones when we can focus more on ourselves. You can do both. You can be a parent and fight not losing yourself. Just work on not letting your true self slip away behind all the chores, sports, cooking, cleaning, and mile long lists. We are in this together. Be true to yourself, forgive yourself, and know that you are YOUR savior. Give yourself time.
The Poetess
The musk of her words
Brings tears
like rainfall.
A weeping rain.
Heart caged.
Pulling at the bite.
The poetess.
Destroyer of Content.
The Bringer of the Real.
Keeper of the Imprints of Hearts.
When her words fall,
the world aches.
And there is no thing as a better place or time.
